I used to nod my head religiously when someone would talk about self-care, but I low-key thought it was unnecessary.
When my coaches said, “You deserve to take a break”, I would agree but be thinking in the back of my mind “Pfft, I don’t have time for that.”
When something went wrong in my business or someone said no, I’d latch onto my negative thoughts and throw myself a pity party, saying shit like “Why can’t it happen for 𝘮𝘦?!?”
It was because I believed I wasn’t worthy of receiving.
I have always rejected compliments.
If someone did something for me, I had the immediate urge to repay them.
I couldn’t take credit for my work or be praised for it (𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘺𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘦).
I was also conditioned to believe that women that did things for themselves were selfish - so any type of self-care or self-indulgence I participated in was paired with a thick layer of guilt, meaning I could never enjoy anything.
This all came from a place of believing I wasn’t worthy of receiving any kind of good - whether it be compassion, grace, generosity, praise, abundance - and this all carried into receiving from my business.
𝗦𝗼 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸, 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁?
Believing that you’re worthy of good things. Of rest. Of self-care. Of self-indulgence. Of anything you damn well desire.
And begin to disprove anything that says otherwise.
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