How to Actually Become Your Highest Self

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A KEY element we are working within my group coaching container - the From Impostor to Empowered (FITE) Program, is your most worthy, highest self. People say the next level self, highest self; I call her your worthy woman identity, whatever you call it - it is that highest version of you. The elevated version of you that has what you want, who you want to be, and embodies the thoughts, habits, behaviors, and actions that you imagine you’d embody if you were the best version of yourself. 

 

Highest self work is so freakin’ potent and fun to play with, because if you do it right, you will inevitably become that highest and best version of yourself over time. But how do you actually begin this process? How do you actually start becoming that highest and best version of yourself?

 

So for one, the reason why we do highest self work is because:

 

1) It is the...

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Attracting Clients through Showing Up & Self-Belief

Listen to this episode on the From Imposter to Empowered podcast:

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Attracting clients through showing up is what happens when you have potent levels of self-belief. Because when you love yourself, when you’re confident in yourself and what you have to offer, it is easy to show up and share your work with the world. To put it very simply, that is what creates consistency without effort.

 

My clients ask me all the time, Jill where the f*ck do you get the energy to show up all the time? And the truth is, I am a very low energy person. Social media makes me tired - BUT, my business energizes me. It excites me to think about signing clients, making money, doing my sacred work. Truly, it does! And I choose to market my services via social media, and therefore, I decide that the energy it takes to do that - is worth it.

 

So, how do you consistently show up for your audience from a place of self-belief?

 

I want you to first understand that...

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Belief Alone Yields Results

Belief 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲 yields results.

A study was done on a first grade classroom and their teacher. At the beginning of the year, the teacher was told that all of the students were tested, and that 5 of the kids were gifted. At the end of the year, the students were tested again, and those same 5 children had exceptional results.

But the teacher was only 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 that those 5 children tested as gifted in the beginning of the year - they actually tested normal. HOWEVER, at the end of the year, those 5 children actually 𝘥𝘪𝘥 test as gifted.

Why? Because the teacher 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗱 that those 5 children were gifted. She believed in them and treated them as gifted, which yielded high-performing results.

𝗕𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗳 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁.

Belief in who you are, what you sell, and who you help. Belief that it’s working. Belief that you’re on the track. Belief that you’re already worthy, and the rest will come.

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 happens between knowing you’re worthy, and the manifestation, the clients,...

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Are You Fully Showing Up As Yourself?

Have you ever heard/gotten results for yourself & your clients and still felt like a fraud?

I have to ask - are you fully showing up as yourself?

𝐏𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞-𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬-𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧-𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐲𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫. You don’t feel good enough or capable enough, so you mould your personality, your actions, your services & prices, and your IG stories to please the masses, hoping not to be outed or criticized.

You’ve gotten so used to 𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 - judgement or criticism or feeling bad, that you present a version of yourself that is not authentic. Because while you’re posting that you’re a bad bitch, you feel like a fraud, think no one cares what you have to say, and that what you’re doing isn’t “working”.

So what do you think will happen when you start to see success? That “fake it til you make it” attitude will become even more anxiousness, worry, and lack of transparency/authenticity - because you believe that...

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You Can Build a Business Without Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

𝐎𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐚 𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐞, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟𝐬.

But why would you want to?

It would be like going up a mountain without any water. Sure, you can get to your destination - but how was the journey?

Were you stepping more and more into your power, taking every step in stride, feeling rejuvenated and hydrated? Were you positive you’d make it?

Or were you looking around and anxiously stopping along the way, trying to preserve your energy? Did you feel scarce, anxious, and unsure? Were you constantly questioning your every move and wondering if you were gonna make it?

No, the inner work isn’t a requirement to making money in entrepreneurship. But you’re here for more than just “making money” - this is your life’s work. You want to grow, scale, build an empire.

And while the way you’re trudging up the mountain may be working, it isn’t sustainable.

The way you’re...

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This Is What I Call The Other Shoe Effect

This Is What I Call The Other Shoe Effect 

When you’re subconsciously pushing away good-feeling experiences in your business because when you feel good, your internal alarm goes off, letting you know that something bad might happen.

So you subconsciously push away success or feeling good, because you’re worried that something bad has to happen as a result of your happiness.

This might look like - not celebrating after a good launch or signing a client, feeling the need to overwork and “do” more when things are feeling calm + easy, or spending more money than you’re making once you start hitting higher months!

It’s important to remember that your brain is always trying to keep you safe. It’s job is to scope out danger when there’s uncertainty or when your “guard is down”.

Work on proving old stories wrong, consistently grounding yourself and your body, and practicing better feeling thoughts that won’t take you down...

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You Are The Author of Your Story

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲.

You decide what you give meaning.

On the playground, I found out a boy in our class liked me. Another schoolmate turned to me and said, “Why would 𝘩𝘦 like 𝘺𝘰𝘶?”

I wondered what it could possibly be. My hair, my face, the clothes I wore? I settled on what made sense to me - the fact that I stuttered.

I decided that this boy wouldn’t like me if he got to know me, because then he’d realize that I stuttered, and that was the worst thing about me.

I carried this story with me everywhere I went. I grew up with this story.

It loomed over me like a dark cloud.

I made every no, every rejection, every side sneer, every negative interaction 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 that I was incapable, unworthy, unintelligent, unlovable - all because I was a person who stuttered.

You’re the same. You have something that you lean towards when you’re not getting your way. You have something that you’ve decided makes you unworthy, incapable, unintelligent,...

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Your Personal Experience Makes You An Expert

I call myself an Imposter Syndrome Expert, but not 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 because I have a psychology-educated background and experience with people who struggle with it.

𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡, that I know firsthand how feeling like an imposter can affect every part of your life.

Each step towards my progress was made anxiously and with negative expectation, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Waiting for someone to look at me and go, “You don’t belong here”.
Waiting for this arbitrary “moment” where I would be called out and lose everything.

My boundaries were non-existent.
I was judgemental of others to protect myself.
I worried about my clients’ results because I thought it meant something about me.
I was always feeling scarce even when I started to make money, because I worried it would just 𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 one day.

The way to release these scarce thoughts & feelings so your business doesn’t feel like an emotional energy vacuum?

𝐃𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞...

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Feeling Like You Are Always Wrong?

You’ve always felt 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨.

Your opinions didn’t feel legitimate until they were validated by someone else.
Your ideas were kept secret because you thought they were stupid.
Your feelings felt unwarranted because you thought you had “no right” to feel that way.

You’re always looking for the right thing → the right decision, the right path, the right message.

Did it ever occur to you that the answer is to fully fucking accept yourself for who you are and then go from there?

The problem isn’t that you’re wrong. The problem is you’re making everything about you 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮.

You’re allowed to be here.
You’re allowed to take up space.
You’re allowed to have your juicy, exciting ideas.

You created your business to break free of the very thing you’re letting stand in your way - an employee mindset that follows the rules, constantly looks for guidance & validation, and believes that everything is...

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Why should I work on overcoming my inner imposter early on in my business?

When I’ve asked more seasoned entrepreneurs what they wish they focused on more in the beginning of their business, they alllll told me - 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐞𝐭.

Because, it all comes down to the beliefs you hold about yourself, the world, money, and making money, honey.

And it all comes down to the thoughts you have, how you respond to those thoughts, and then the stories you allow your thoughts to tell you.

When you 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 focus on mindset early on:

you’ll create limitations around what you can & cannot do
your strategy will fall flat because there’s no belief or energy in the execution
you’ll take every rejection personally
you’ll spiral and then disappear, lacking consistency

When you 𝘥𝘰 focus on mindset early on, you’ll:

break through limitations because you know everything can be figured out
rebound from setbacks faster
de-personalize rejection
maintain consistency because you trust yourself & your path

There’s lots of ways you can...

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